Safe in the Arms of God

I honestly don't know where to begin.  Serving God wherever you are in world is not easy. God never promised it would be.  We have dealt with no power, no electricity, bumps in the car,  loved and lost dear friends to new horizons, we have even come through melanoma cancer. Time is a wonderful healer and as I look back even these things (bar the cancer) seem relatively feeble three years on.  When I wrote the last blog I mentioned I was leaving my present job at Heritage.  I had also been interviewed and offered a new job at nearby international school where some of the other MAF children attend.  The job offer was dependant on references of course.  Never did I think that one of my references could have caused my offer to be rescinded but there is a first time for everything. In two years in my job I have poured my heart and soul (and finances) into being the best teacher I could be. It was crushing when the job offer was rescinded and I had to edit the blog I had just posted to you all now leaving an uncertain void as to my plans for the next year.  Meeting after meeting to find out where I could be going wrong as a teacher and what was I doing that could have cost me a job in the small international community left no answers,  no evidence,  and a line of poor management.  Still,  I could pick myself up from this - God had a plan.  Deep within I had been sure God was calling me to this decision and pursued the applications of Abigail and Eilidh to the new school.  During the application process of our girls I was called into a meeting with the management at the new school.  I have never been in the position where there was a job opening for an elementary music teacher and I was a qualified unemployed music teacher, yet a soon to be parent at the said school.  Wondering what role I could take (volunteer?) or if I could ever apply for another job there led to several conversations and an invitation for a second interview. The interview panel was different and I repeated the interview again and was able to explain the happenings of the last few months with documented evidence of areas that I could only speculate were issues as I was refused any glance at the reference that cost me the job.  Relief and thankfulness when I was offered the position (again!) this time - no strings attached.  What a rollercoaster! Telling your four year old you are going to be her music teacher next year and see the joy in her face,  and then having to tell her that mummy isn't going to be working at the school anymore was heartbreaking.  The ripple effects of possibly having no second income was felt around our house staff in particular. All of their families would be affected and those who we support.  It was such a relief to tell  my girls again that I would be at their school.   All I want to do as a teacher is ensure I can give my kids the best music education I can and BE there for them.

In the midst of all the above "soap opera drama" (as Andy called it!),  It has been the busiest time of my career. Conducting 270 kids a the international music festival was exciting.  Meanwhile rehearsals were underway for Beauty and the Beast production that would take place at the end of April.  Due to the many weekly rehearsals (it's all done after school) I would miss seeing Joyce and Darius as when Andy would get home from work,  they would leave.  On Wednesday Joyce sells her doughnut balls and bread at the school market.  Darius had been sick with a cold and I took them home from the market one Wednesday afternoon around 5pm.  He was sleeping. I never saw them on the Thursday as I was late home.  I decided to leave at 3pm on the Friday and that was when I noticed Darius had been sleeping for four or five hours.  I noticed he was agitated while sleeping as though struggling for oxygen and packed Joyce and Darius into the car to go to the surgery (ex-pat clinic).  It was rush hour, 5pm, and it took us over an hour to get there.  He was getting more agitated in the car as he struggled to breath.  He was rushed straight into the resuscitation room. Breathing treatments helped however when they finished he would crash.  I don't really want to go into all the details.  It was traumatic for us all and very "African".  If ever I have felt like a foreigner - it was at this moment helping Joyce go through what no parent should ever have to experience.  Thankfully her brother arrived to also give her some support.  Meanwhile I tried to deal with the nurses (who were wonderful) and the oxygen tank which failed at one point.  I tried to keep joyce from falling apart when her baby needed her most and encouraged her to hold him so she could say her goodbye. I switched the machine off as she took off the oxygen mask so she could cuddle him.  His levels were so low that the machine was not having any more effect on him. I watched the sweet fifteen month old that had stolen our hearts gasp his last breath here on earth.  If anyone could have told me three years ago that that's where I would be on that Friday evening would I have ever come to Africa?  YES I would. As useless as I felt in that hospital room I know God planted us here not just to serve with MAF but for that lady - Joyce.  God chose my family to hold her hand through her worst nightmare and in the midst of the grief for that I am so humbled.  Andy left early Saturday morning to help with the arrangements and basically be a chauffeur for the weekend as they drove the 7 hour drive to the congo border.  Culturally the baby must be buried in the Father's village.  The Father was in Congo and could not attend the funeral. Joyce stayed there for three days till the burial was complete and then returned to her mother's village.  Joyce has since been very sick with typhoid from drinking untreated water in the village.  She is slowly on the mend and is returning gradually to work this week.  I remember at our cross cultural training, someone mentioned that missionaries often see  more people die in a few years than others do in a life time - we, and other MAF families can testify to this.

The week after Darius died, I had 800 people coming to see the production I had organised.  It was the final week of dress rehearsals,  night rehearsals in the dark - no time to sit or even cry with others about what I had just witnessed.   Then after the production,  it was the end of year concerts.  Now that that is done, it is exam time, marking and entering grades,  packing up my resources,  and clearing out my classroom. Meanwhile I have to clear out my home from the cot,  the high chair,  the toys, the nappies.   This furlough will definitely be different. I honestly don't even think I can get up to speak and share about how life has been these past months so please accept this blog as our family update.    It will hopefully be a time of rest and healing and refreshing in our faith as we gear up for another year here in Kampala.  

There have been many spiritual battles within  the MAF team over these last months as many families have gone through major life altering events.  Some are recovering from post traumatic stress,  some are grieving the loss of a loved one,  some are unable to be spoken about publicly.  It has been a rough season for many.  Please continue to pray for the many MAF families here.

Thank you to all of you who have supported Darius. Your love and prayers have touched and encouraged all of us, but especially Joyce.  Before Darius was born she only attended our church as the children's worker for the under five's.  Now she also attends her own  church later on a Sunday and they have been a wonderful support to her through this time. Joyce also has the hope that she will see her son again in Heaven one day.

Andy and Eilidh will fly to the UK this coming Sunday. Myself and Abi and Matthew will follow in the 5th of June. We are looking forward to seeing you all and catching up with YOUR news.  Andy will be in Dunoon Baptist Church on the 5th of June and then we will be at Kirkintilloch Baptist church on the 11th. We plan to be at Pitlochry on the 18th of June and then will be having some family holiday/rest time.

Our supporters really mean the world to us and I can't begin to tell you all how we appreciate your continual giving and prayers which allow us to serve God and the people of Uganda.

Lots of love

Heather (Andy, Abigail, Matthew and Eilidh)